Help! Should I Postpone my Wedding...?
As I write this we are currently in Lockdown in the UK due to the dreaded Covid-19, a.k.a The Coronavirus pandemic that has swept through the globe. (Unless you've been hiding under a rock for the past few months, then I'm sure you know what it is so I'm not going to delve any deeper into this).
Anyway, if you have found yourself reading this blog post then I guess you might be in the unfortunate position where wedding postponement is on the horizon in the very near future or you have already had to do it. You'll either be at the stage where you are contacting your wedding suppliers and asking them to reschedule your date or will be at least contemplating whether or not your day will go ahead as originally planned.
During the latest Government announcement, Boris outlined his Phased Plan for the return of normality, and although phase one has started, at this stage it is really difficult to predict how the next few months are going to look in terms of public gatherings and in particular, weddings. He has mentioned the possibility of small "bubbles" of people being allowed to socialise together safely from June onwards and has just released dates when non-essential shops are going to open on the high street so surely weddings and events must be around the corner too?
Let's talk hypothetically now. If we are given the go-ahead for our July, August & September weddings onwards, then how are they even going to look?
You must have so many questions, because I certainly do...
When are we going to be allowed to hug our families?
Are guests going to be allowed to travel to our wedding venue?
Are we even going to be allowed to be in the same room as 100+ people?
Will we have to wear surgical face masks and sit 2m apart from other people?
Will my wedding venue have procedures in place to keep everyone safe?
Unfortunately I don't have the answers to these questions, because let be honest - who does?
...but what I can do right now is offer you a few small snippets of advice from a wedding supplier's perspective.
We have worked with nearly 500 brides over the course of the past six years and have styled a crazy amount of different wedding venues across the whole of the UK and what we have learnt is that every single wedding is completely different.
Although you might be getting married at the same venue as someone you know, or on the same date as a friend, your guest list is highly unlikely to be made up of the same selection of people. You'll have guests and suppliers involved who are all different ages, from different backgrounds with a variety of contrasting health conditions. Some might be disabled and require extra shielding, some might be newborn babies and some will most certainly be super fit, healthy adults. Are some of your guests NHS or key workers?
No two wedding venues are the same either. They'll be some that are bigger than others, some that are outdoors and some that are abroad. Some will have loads of staff and others will be unmanned.
Because each wedding is different and some things will be a bigger concern to you more than others and some things will be a bigger concern to others more than you, my advice is quite simply this...
DO WHAT FEELS BEST FOR YOU AND YOUR OWN SITUATION.
Take a look at your guest list and see who you have invited. Are they all likely to come? Would you be happy with the day if some of them didn't turn up or are you not prepared to compromise on this? This will be a key point you need to consider when choosing to postpone.
Talk to your guests and find out what they would be happy and comfortable with. I know this sounds like really simple advice, but you might be worrying that nobody will want to come to your wedding but your guests might be really looking forward to getting out of the house and celebrating with you without the same worries that you have. Just simply ask them how you could make them feel safe and if they are worried, then at least you'll know.
Talk to your wedding suppliers. Your wedding suppliers are in a very similar position to you and will totally understand your worries and concerns. Chat to them 1:1 and ask them as many questions as you need to in order to put your mind at rest. They'll be able to tell you about their current position regarding availability of new dates and what they plan to do in response to the pandemic.
Prioritise your most crucial supplier and contact them first. I would also write down a list of who your most important suppliers are and which one is literally at the top of your list in terms of priority. All of your suppliers will have been booked because you love what they do, but one or two of them may be at the absolute top of your list and your wedding just wouldn't be the same without them. Contact these suppliers first and check what dates they have available if you were to postpone. I can't stress enough that you need to do this as soon as you can. We have already moved 22 weddings over to new dates and have 48 prime dates booked in our diary for 2021! You wouldn't want to miss out on your favourite wedding supplier's services due to them being unable to accommodate your changes - so get in touch asap!
Try to stay Positive. The reality is that when weddings do begin go ahead, they might be a little bit different than they were before so it's really important to take into account these changes and embrace them. If you're worried about everyone's safety, design a super cool hand sanitiser station! There's no need for this to be clinical, worrisome and look out of place. Why not create some nice signage and display it in a really beautiful way that fits in with the rest of the wedding styling? It will then become a treasured memory of your day and help to make your wedding unique.
And finally, don't do something just because everyone else is! The fact of the matter is that their wedding day is not your wedding day and their situation is completely different to yours. Don't let others pressure you into making decisions that you are uncomfortable with and do what is best for you and your partner, because after all, you guys are the most important people involved in your wedding and should make your decision based on your own circumstances.
Here at The Rustic Wedding Company we are working hard behind the scenes to make sure that all of our clients who are facing postponements have a shoulder to lean on and chat to. After speaking to a variety of different people in the wedding industry, we know how difficult you must be finding it so please do reach out to us if you have concerns. We're here to help.
We have also created a secret group on Facebook called The Rustic Bride Tribe in order to have a safe space where we can all chat together and ask each other questions to make the most of a rubbish situation. Unless you are a bride yourself and are facing the same problems and worry, it is unlikely that you'll understand the way a bride is feeling right now in exactly the same way as they do so we've gathered all of the local brides together in a positive environment to support each other through this.
Whether it is next week, next month or next year, your wedding day will happen and it will still be amazing!
After all, it is a celebration of Love right?
And love always wins.
Lesley & Team Rustic xx